Would I Lie?

Copyright by Ruth Lampert March 2008


One of the ways you can tell that my memoir, “Ruth on Wry,” is true is that it is not about surviving a cruel , abusive past. And if I did embellish a bit here and there to make an anecdote more entertaining, isn’t that what story-tellers always do? O.K., so maybe every little detail isn’t totally in accord with the known facts. Maybe I wasn’t actually wearing a plaid pleated skirt and knee socks on the day I carried the garbage to school instead of dumping it into the backyard incinerator. But I did carry the garbage to school one time, and I did wear plaid pleated skirts and knee socks, lots of times.

And the story about my thinking the hot tub was for nude bathing when actually it wasn’t, isn’t the most original embarrassing moment ever recounted – apparently not only in dreams does one find oneself semi or not-at-all clothed in places where the dress code means you can’t be butt naked.

The instances of fake memoirs are increasing, or maybe they are just coming to light more frequently these days. I find myself wondering if some of those famous/classic life stories, which I will not mention here for fear of legal
consequences were – well, if not completely invented, significantly fictionalized. Michael Kinsley in his recent Time Magazine essay, says “It is time for a prestigious commission to re-examine all autobiographies, including classics like Rousseau’s Confession and The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin.” I presume he has competent legal advisors. At first I thought he was serious, but then he notes “It’s only a matter of time until Little Red Riding admits that her story is ‘exaggerated’ I have some grandmother stories myself that benefit from a touch of creative embellishment, although it is quite true that when she scolded the neighborhood children for drawing chalk pictures on the sidewalk, and they responded “The sidewalk is public!” she did actually scream at them in her memorable Hungarian accent, “Your ass be public too!” I have witnesses to this and other less-than-typical-grandma anecdotes. .

Another way you can tell that my memoir is based on truth is that it is not particularly inspirational. Not that growing up was without trials and hardships, most significantly the tragedy of my father’s early death. But I did not experience sexual molestation, hunger, or homelessness. The apartment in Chicago was indeed crowded, and I guess by today’s standards five people and one bathroom seems semi-slum, but actually, it was pretty nice.

There is one inspirational aspect to “Ruth on Wry” – it may lead you to think “If this airhead can write a book, so can I.”

Margaret Seltzer was exposed by her very own sister for her recent, best-selling, and fraudulent, Love and Consequences. As for me, I am confident my sister will not blow the whistle on my creative exaggerations and adornments. She doesn’t have a computer, so she doesn’t read my blog.

About my brother, I’m not so sure.